4 Basic Online Forum User Archetypes

It is helpful to know which character to portray when sockpuppeting or otherwise becoming part of a community that you want nothing to do with except for troll purposes. These archetypes are what happen when one’s ego comes between mind and keyboard – it is stupid and these people should feel stupid.

For this concept, I have formulated a new acronym: PEBMAKProblem Exists Between Mind And Keyboard.

Anyway, these are some basic archetypes I’ve noticed in your everyday unaware forum users:

The Little Bitch

The little bitch is labeled as such because he bends over backwards to acommodate the community’s opinions and beliefs, often taking shit from the other users and loving it. He finds himself often unsure and has no opinion or critical thinking skills of his own. He is a pure useful idiot, but that’s just it: he’s an idiot. He just echoes others’ opinions for approval because he wants to belong.
The Little Bitch Forum Archetype
If he found another community before this one, he would’ve been a part of it too, sharing the same approved opinions of that community. These are probably one of the most common characters in friendlier online communities because these guys can sometimes take too much shit and get their feelings hurt in more tight-knit “elitist” communities.

It is good to create several sockpuppets of these to suck the dick of the Unique Faggot, described in the next entry. This will put your Unique Faggot at a great advantage.

The Unique Faggot

The opinionated Unique Faggot is the counterpart to the little bitch, the yin to little bitch’s yang. He often holds an opinion for the sake of having a slightly different, more complex or “better” version of the common opinion that is shared by the community, thus making himself more special and elevating his status above that of the rest of the horde.
The Unique Faggot Forum Archetype
Like the little bitch, he is a pure useful idiot except his ego wishes to have all of the glory and the power that comes with being part of a stupid online forum. In an online community, there is probably one of these per 10 members, and they often shit on and stand on the backs of Little Bitches to gain their forum ego-status. The more little bitches that they have on their cock, the bigger their egos and forum statuses grow. Some of the bigger ones even have entire hierarchical chains of little bitches and unique faggots forming the structure and basis of their ego-pyramid, and their opinion-influence trickles down, like imaginary wealth.

If there aren’t enough little bitches around and/or they haven’t been around the community for long, they are shunned down into Little Bitch-hood for that particular community. If not enough people think they’re cool or unique individuals or whatever, these tools go to other communities.

Because unique faggots often spur controversy and become a locus of influence, this is a key archetype to emulate with sockpuppets. Combine with your own array of Little Bitches, and your Unique Faggot will become talk of the town. You can create infights and tear apart entire online communities this way.

The Pseudo-troll

This little fucklord thinks he is a troll, so he says stupid shit and shits on threads like a retarded little baby getting spaghetti all over his face and his high chair eating tray. He adds nothing constructive to any discussion, and the pseudo-troll is often half of where Little Bitches get their shit from.

When it comes down to it, he is often a bored little loser that has a severe case of ADD/ADHD, and can’t formulate a single critical thought or opinion because it requires too much focus to do so. He just wants to stir shit up and have a giggle. Don’t we all? 😀

As he matures or settles down, he often evolves into a Unique Faggot if he is a big enough loser who hates his life enough to value his membership with that particular community. Otherwise, he will move on aimlessly from one forum to the next until he kills himself or has to go to the store to reload on some Doritos.

This is a good archetype to emulate with a sockpuppet in order to shit on or derail a given thread that you may not have the upper hand in. He may also double as a Little Bitch. YAY! GO BRUNHILDE! ❤

The Zealous Moderator

There’s always a couple of these moderators someplace. They often evolve from power-hungry Unique Faggots into Zealous Moderators if they have proven to be an egotistical gravitational center of member activity and discussion, i.e. he’s the talk of the forum because he’s so unique and cool. Administrators see that this Unique Faggot creates activity and discussion, and they like that their community is so active with discussion, so they put this guy in charge of part of their community to make them feel more special than they already feel.
Zealous Moderator Forum Archetype

What happens if you stoke the fires of the ego with moderation privileges? He becomes an even bigger asshole than before. He will shit on people for having different opinions, he will not foster constructive discussion and exchange of ideas, and he will lord his power with an egotistical iron fist.

This will work for you if your sockpuppet becomes one of these. It only gives you more influence in a given online community.

Am i doing it right?

If it resembles this, then yes.

Forum Archetype Sockpuppets